Friday, 20 April 2018


Keep In Control
Keep In Control

1. Don't criticize, condemn, or complain.

"If you want to gather honey, don't kick over the beehive"
Instead of doing the same old typical habits that nowadays people do which is complaining and condemning for something that less satisfying or doesn't suit their preference heart content, let's try to take a moment to re-evaluate and understand the situation, hold the horse down! Let's try to figure out why someone behaving or doing what they do. Always keep in mind that there's a lot more profitable and constructive approaches than criticism, which can breed sympathy, tolerance and kindness.

  • Criticism is futile and destructive, it makes people turn defensive and often justifies themselves.
  • Criticism will wound a person's precious pride and make them lose face which will hurt their sense of self-importance and ignite hatred.
  • Criticism does not make lasting changes and often it will only breed hatred and resentment to others. 
Does it make sense now that criticism is just a waste of time and energy to be adopted when you are trying to point out something that is wrong in others? You might know the answer. But, what is the best way to point out what is wrong without reserving to criticism? it will be explained in the next principles, keep reading keenly.

This is written by W. Livingston Larned, “Father Forgets.” one of the most moving and heart-warming, it teaches us a lot about the little things that we overlooked.

I will speak ill of no man and speak all the good I know of everybody. -Benjamin Franklin
A great man shows his greatness, by the way, he treats little men. -Carlyle

2. Give honest and sincere appreciation. 

"The biggest secret of dealing with people"
Giving someone a kind word of appreciation will make their day better, and it must be done in an honest and sincere way, people tend to remember the bad things that happen to them, but never we forget that an honest and sincere word will also be remembered for a long time. We shall keep in mind that everyone likes to be complimented, it is in our human nature that we always carving to be appreciated.

  • People adore the feeling of self-importance when you give them an honest and sincere appreciation, therefore they will cooperate more with those who are able to provide them with the feeling of self-importance.
  • Able to boost and ignite the level of energy and enthusiasm among people in order to drive them toward the goal that you want them to accomplish.
  • Leaving a friendly trail of little sparks of gratitude that could ignite the flame of friendship, which would make people remember and respect you.
Bear in mind that appreciation and flattery are almost sound the same which is pleasing people with kind words, however, there is a difference between these two. One is sincere and the other insincere. One comes from the heart out; the other came from the lips out. One is unselfish; the other is selfish. One is a true admiration; the other being sarcastic.

A sincere appreciation is one of the biggest secrets on how he successfully handling his men, which is applied by Jhon D. Rockefeller in his business empire.

I consider my ability to arouse enthusiasm among men the greatest asset I possess. The way to develop the best that is in a man is by appreciation and encouragement.-Charles M. Schwab

3. Arouse in the other person an eager want- Making them want to do something willingly.

"He who can do this has the whole world with him"
A very quick relate; When you are going for fishing, do you think about what you want and bait the hook with what you want, or do you think about what the fish want and bait the hook with what the fish wanted to eat?. This is merely a common sense but yet we often overlooked this, does it make sense if we are applying this same concept to "HOOK" for people?

Either in sales, relationships, politics or in any aspect of life, the only way to influence and win other people heart is to talk in term of their interest, let them talk about what they want and you are there to show them how to get it and in the same time convince them to do the things that you want them to do as it related to what they want.

  • The only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.
  • Always ask yourself this question "What is this person wants, and how can I leverage that to my advantages?" before you want to persuade or asking someone to do something for you.
  • Put yourself in other person shoes and see things from that person's angel as well as from your own.
There is no other way to makes other people do things that you want without stating the fact on what they want and do they get what they want by doing the things that you want or ask them to do. From now on we should realize that rushing into heedlessly futile chatter about our desire will not get other people interested to do what we need them to do.

If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle as well as from your own. -Henry Ford

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